Islands in the Stream

To all of you that don't live in New Zealand. Here's what you're missing:

I know it's been a while so just wanted to make sure everyone could still envision our little island life on the other side of the world. Glad we got that sorted. Ahh sorted, just one of the many words I've picked up in the past couple years. It's funny because although NZ is an English speaking country there are times it really feels like a different language. I'm use to it now and so much of it has integrated naturally into my own vocab, but I was thinking back to initially how strange it all was. To help you understand, here's the same conversation two ways:

Hazel, take the underwear off your head and finish your snack so we can go to the beach and meet the Royals*. I'll need to change your diaper and put on your bathing suit. Now where did I put my flip flops? Mommy has to go to the bathroom and put the clothes in the dryer first and then we'll be ready to go. Do you think Kate and Will drink Bud or Bud light? Please pass me my phone so I can find out, thank you Hazel.

Hazel, take the underwear off your head and finish your morning tea so we can go to the beach and meet the Royals.* I'll need to change your nappy and put your togs on. Now where did I put my jandals? Mummy has to go the toilet and hang the clothes first and then I'll be ready to go. Do you think Will and Kate drink Speights or Steinlager? Please pass me my phone so I can get it organised. Ta Hazel.

*Will and Kate were unable to meet us at the beach that day. Apparently they had a better offer.

While we didn't host the royals while they were here we did host some other international travelers. CISV, Children's International Summer Village, is an organization that I was involved with when I was younger. I think I mentioned on an earlier post that as a part of this, I went to live in Finland for a month with kids from all over the world. Part of that experience involved staying with a host family for a weekend to experience typical Finnish life. Fast forward many years later and now I'm playing hostess with the mostess to two 11-year-old boys, because nothing says classic Kiwi experience like living with an American couple that has been in the country for two years.

Kenneth was from the Philippines and Liam hailed from an exotic country across the ditch called Australia. We played tour guide part of the time, but honestly they just loved playing basketball with Adam at our local park so we spent a lot of time there. They were very cute with Hazel and when we dropped them off at camp they pointed at Hazel and told their friends, "That's the baby I helped take care of."

Another memorable quote happened while watching American Ninja Warrior. They saw one of the contestants doing the obstacle course and called to me in the kitchen that I had to come watch, "because there is a guy that is like 36 and he has big muscles and he even has a kid." A 36-year-old guy in good physical shape and a father was apparently about as shocking to them as a freak at the circus. Awesome.

After all that international-ness I decided it was time to go back to my roots and kick it Tennessee style, which is why I went to see Dolly Parton in February. That and the fact that I love me some Dolly.

 

Life is short, so spur of the moment I found a 2nd row solo seat on Trade Me and Adam got it for me for my birthday. It was so good. She freaking played Rocky Top! Me listening to Rocky Top in Auckland, New Zealand. I can say with 99.9%  certainty that I was the only person in Vector Arena that knew the words. For those not familiar with said song I realize this will mean nothing, but for those that are of course it means everything. It was a great show and despite crying through most of the first set, I had a great time. I mean Jolene live is just too much to handle for this girl.

In other news, Hazel just finished her first term at "school." Something amazing they offer here is a community crèche, which is a non-profit community early childhood centre, basically a little day care. It's fabulous because the sessions are just twice a week for a few hours, and ready for the most amazing part - It cost $12!! Not per hour, which would still be a steal, but for the whole session!

 

I thought surely for this price they must stick them in a dark room and slide their food under the door, but no it's totally legit. They have all sorts of great activities for them and its mixed ages so Hazel gets socialized with lots of different kids. The teachers are great and she loves it. They even make a book for each child highlighting their time there.

With my new found freedom I've started playing tennis once a week and it's been so fun. I clearly need the outlet seeing as on the way to the courts last week, "Eye of the Tiger" came on the radio and I immediately envisioned myself as a warrior/athlete/powerhouse destroying the ball and anyone in it's path. So yes, I'd say it's a good thing.

Otherwise it's business as usual. That means lots of trips to the beach:

WARNING: Obscene number of  photos of the same child follow, please turn back now if this is not the path for you.

Birthday parties:

Sunny days on the back patio:

A trip to the zoo:

Fun at coffee group:

Bike rides:

Swinging at the playground:

Walks in the park:

Chillin':

Afternoon errands:

Elevator (kiwspeak - lift) rides at the library:

Outings to kid friendly cafes:

And as we move closer to Winter I'll cherish days like this one at Bethells Beach.

 

 

 When New Zealand is good, it's so good.

 

The 1st Year of Motherhood: A Retrospective

To commemorate surviving my first year of motherhood, PJ, Pretend Journalist, is back to interview me on those first 365 days. Any resemblance to an actual interview, with persons living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

 
PJ: Wow. Last time I saw you, you were big as a house. I guess that basketball finally decided to make it’s way to the court. When did she finally arrive?

KW: Jan 5^th, 2013. She was 15 days late. I was beyond ready and by ready I mean over it. Clearly she arrived on her own sweet time. Hard to believe she is over a year old already.
 

PJ: Well, it’s not really that hard to believe actually. It’s just simple math or maths as they call it in the country you’re living in.

KW: I know it’s just one of those cliché things Moms say that feels so real when it’s your child. It’s the longest days, but fastest weeks kind of time thing.

PJ: So what do you remember about those early days?

KW: Oh man, I remember quite a bit - the exhaustion, the hormones, the my life is just beginning/my life is over feelings,  but at the same time a lot is really foggy. I do remember very clearly being at birth care in Warkworth and holding Hazel, she was a day old, and it really hitting me that she was mine. That finally she was here and just weeping. I was so happy. The joy was overwhelming. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced and still is. Having a child is indescribable.

PJ: Well for the readers at home and my editor I’m going to need you to try to describe it.

KW: It’s primal. I feel connected to other women who are moms even if I don’t know them. I’m not kidding when I say that I see a woman on the sidewalk pushing a baby in her pram and think you go girl. I don’t know how long it took you to get out of the house today, but you did it and you’re a rockstar just for doing what you do. With that being said, if I was to meet said woman and find out  we had way different parental values or style I probably wouldn't be inviting  her over to drink box wine with me, if you know what I'm saying. This parenting stuff is weird.

PJ: And boring. Why are new Moms soooo boring?

KW: Oh I wish I could disagree with you, but that is often the case. Now that I’ve been through it I think I understand why.  Having a baby does make you fall in love so there is that aspect of, “BUT DON”T YOU UNDERSTAND I HAVE A BABY!!” Look at my BABY!!!. Baby baby baby.

And then due to babies high level of need, whether you like it or not they become your sole focus because they are depending on you for everything. I know it's obvious, but it's worth remembering.

Also, you are just so freaking tired because you are not sleeping. My mind literally rejected anything above 3^rd grade reading level. I wanted to want to care about world news and other people’s lives, but it was hard to. I was so exhausted that even though the adrenaline carries you, you are still are only barely functioning. It takes effort to be interesting and fun and if all energy goes towards the baby, well guess what? You aren’t going to be topping anybody’s list of who to bring to the opening of that art gallery, that turns into a juice bar, that turns into a an underground club, that was just a experiential art exhibit all along. Lucky for me my social life is practically non existent so it wasn't much of an adjustment.

PJ: Speaking of adjustments, what do you think has been the hardest thing to adjust to?

KW: I think the 24-7ness of it. I mean the day in day out stuff  is harder with a baby no doubt, but to me it's all doable. The part that takes getting use to is how it doesn't really ever stop.

For example,  I'll do something with Hazel that I think is engaging and interactive, like some silly game that involves building towers out of pillows and hiding under sheets. And it is fun. She's laughing, I'm laughing, all is merry and bright and then I'm like ok that was great I'm over it. I'm exhausted from fake falling into this pile 100 times and I would like to just sit here for a few minutes. We did do that for at least an hour right, look at the clock. nope. 18 minutes. 2 more minutes and I could have counted it as my cardio for the day. It goes without saying it's absolutely worth it just takes some getting use to.

PJ: What has been most surprising about motherhood?

KW: How much it changes your perspective, your relationship, and your boobs. Not necessarily in that order.  Also, how much fun it can be.  Oh, and I didn't realize how much it would make me miss and appreciate my own mom.

PJ: What are some of your favorite memories of the first year?

KW: Definitely all the milestones - rolling over, crawling, her first steps, and meeting family and friends for the first time, but then there is just so much humor in parenting. The time we went to see Adam at work and she managed to do a poo waterfall out of her pants onto the carpet as we talked to one of his  coworkers. The time my midwife came to do a house visit and she weighed Hazel is a flour sack. 

And the number of times I will see something brown in our home and wonder if it is poo or chocolate. I wish I was kidding. I mean I eat a lot of chocolate and Hazel does a lot of poos.

It's fun to think back to the first time we took Hazel on a plane. I don't think I even realized then how much we would travel with her, but she has been amazing. Travel is such a big part of our lives that it was such a relief to know she could fit right into the mix.

Other happy memories are just simple stuff - Adam and her in the pool in swim class, days at the beach, seeing her with my niece and nephews, discovering what foods she likes, pretty much anything that makes her laugh, and lots of other stuff that I can assure you would only be interesting and amusing to myself and Adam.

PJ:  What do you think you are most proud of so far being a Mom?

KW: Probably that when Hazel is older I can look her in the eye and tell her I never #hashtagged anything.  

PJ: How do you find staying home?

KW: I never pictured myself being a stay at home mom, but here I am and more days than not I really enjoy it.  It's kind of like being shot in the heart a hundred times a day with a hundred little arrows that cause your heart to burst with joy, while at the same time being hooked up to a machine that slowly drains all your energy, mental acuity, and standards for what a clean shirt really is. 

PJ: Will there be a Real Housewives of Auckland and will you be in it?

KW: I'd have to say no to that, but if there was I'd watch it! Down the road, I'd love to go back to practicing therapy. I do miss it, but I feel fortunate that for the time being I get to be home.

PJ: How do you think being a mother in New Zealand is different then being a mother in the US?

KW: Probably in lots of ways and many that I don't even realize. I know the midwife model they use here is much different then the typical patient/doctor experience in the US. I was allowed to go 2 weeks past my due date, which I'm almost positive wouldn't have happened if I was at home. The fact that my midwife did home visits until Hazel was 6 weeks old was amazing. I talked on an earlier post about Warkworth Birth Centre and what a wonderful experience that was.  Basically, hours after I delivered in a hospital I was in the car heading to a "house" in the country where I spent 4 days with round the clock care learning how to breastfeed, bathe, and care for my child all in the comfort of a private room with all meals provided. And it was all free.

In fact, healthcare is free for the first 5 years of a child's life. Women get a year maternity leave and your place of work has to keep your job for a year and then you can tell them if you will be returning or not. Most everyone is set up with a "coffee group," a group of women all having babies at the same time.

My group has met every week since the babies were born, or bubbas they are often called here. Our coffee group also has a private facebook group where we can go and ask each other questions, offer support, share everything from a baby clothing sale to a babysitter. It has been an incredible resource.  There is also Plunket which I have mentioned before that offers all sorts of resources, from car seat rental and installations to a family centers where you can get help on nursing or sleep issues, even taking a nap of your own.

There are  other things like toy libraries and toy vans that drive around in the summer and set up at local parks that I'm pretty stoked to have at my fingertips.

Many places from cafes to the bank to wineries often have toy boxes in them for the children to entertain themselves.  Clearly, New Zealand is family friendly, which is definitely something to get excited about.

PJ: Sounds like it. Well that's all the time we have for today. I think I'll stick to just having my pet bird for the time being but if I ever decide to have a kid I'll look you up. Oh and btw, you have something brown on your shirt. Just thought you should know.

 

*Top and bottom photos by AK Vogel

Won't you take me to Arrowtown?

The most exciting Christmas present I got arrived on December 27th and came direct from San Francisco. Oh happy day to have Mal and Johnny here.

We spent their first few days bumming around Auckland and it's surrounding areas.

A trip to the Matakana Farmers Market, a hike (tramp) at Tawharanui Regional Park, dinner in the city, and the much loved Sunday long lunch at Poderi Crisci on Waiheke Island.

The Sunday long lunch evokes this kind of feeling -

After some time in Auckland with us they headed to the South Island to do some exploring on their own. We met up with them at the end of the week in Queenstown on Hazel's birthday. That's right, she is no longer zero.

And to no one's surprise she likes cake.

The day before we left though, we got to go to the ASB Classic tennis tournament and see Venus Williams play against Ana Ivanovic in the final.

This also goes into the corporate perk category. It was incredible to be that close, the stadium was so small there wasn't a bad seat in the house.

It was an exciting match and Ana took the trophy... but back to our trip and reuniting with the Walkers. We flew into Queenstown, but stayed in a bach in Arrowtown, 20 mins outside of town. Such a neat property and in a gorgeous setting. We had been before, but it was nice to return.

Hazel liked it too.

We had a great time exploring Central Otago and the Lake Hayes region. Nothing says Happy Birthday baby like a trip to the wineries. So off we went. Some of the stops we made were Chard Farm, Peregrine, and Mt. Difficulty.

Not too shabby Mt. Difficulty, not too shabby at all. NZ is so freaking kid friendly that they have toy boxes in all the tasting rooms, or cellar doors as they are called here.

I mean I still can't believe Hazel is 1. Gulp. Tear. More on that another time. Perhaps I'll do a special motherhood edition so people can find out more about things like how to read the same book a gazillion times and feign shock at the end or learn about the copious amounts of different poo styles out there these days.

Anyway, seeing as the 1st birthday is really about the parents celebrating their first year of survival I carried on like it was my day special day. I mean what one -year-old wouldn't want to watch their parents go wine tasting and stand in line at Fergburger? Don't tell me that that high five I gave you after you first started walking didn't count as a party.

So much good food and wine down this way. We had an amazing meal at Saffron one night and the chocolate croissants from Bonjour are not to be missed.

It was pretty sweet because the lady who owned the bach, her daughter babysat for us one night at the steep rate of $7 an hour. My standards for babysitting are this: keep alive. Mission accomplished.

One of the most scenic places we went to was Rippon Vineyard on Lake Wanaka. I thought the wine was only meh, but who cares look at the setting.

The last day it rained so  the owners of the place we were staying took us on an impromptu farm tour on some property they owned down the road, which was pretty cool. One thing I learned: there is a big export business in NZ in the form of velvet antlers. Velvet antlers, named so because of the stage when the male antlers are covered in soft fuzz.

I had never heard of them, but apparently Asian people have. These are used in traditional Chinese medicine and in the West as dietary supplements. Huh, who knew?

And as the saying goes, all good things must come to an end so we had to say goodbye to our bosom buddies. On their last day, Adam was back at work, but Mal and Johnny and I went Stand Up Paddle Boarding. I have literally been wanting to try it since I moved here and since last summer I was with child I decided this summer without child was the time. Did I get up? yes. Did I fall down? yes. Would I do it again? yes.

 

Rocking Out in Melbourne

Literally the day Chris flew out, we flew to Melbourne. While in the airport by the way, I realized this was Hazel's 3rd international flight before the age of 1. Ay-yi-yi. Yes, despite what they teach in school Australia is a separate country from New Zealand.

Normally I wouldn't schedule back to back trips like this, but it's not every day that you get an opportunity to fly to Australia to see Bon Jovi.

Yes Bon Jovi. It's so random and yet so something we couldn't pass up. These are the perks of being married to someone in the corporate sector. In my last job in San Francisco, the kind where you actually got paid in money, not giggles and hope, I couldn't even get an office. I did however learn to pop lock and drop it and do therapy in hallways and stairwells. Talk about livin' on a prayer.

But I digress, back to the good life. So yes, because of Adam we got to go rock out in Melbourne. Luckily we had a dress rehearsal a few weeks prior.

Despite looking this good we did not wear the above outfits to the show. We did wear them to a Rock of Ages costume birthday party. This was back in November so Adam was also doing Movember at the time. Don't hate on me ladies that my man looked that good. Btw, did you know Movember started in Australia? Tons of people do it on this side of the world, to actually raise money and awareness for men's health issues not just to be ironic.

Melbourne is a fantastic city. You can walk everywhere, they have a great food scene, and lots going on.

We went last year, but I was happy to be back because my friend from college, Alicia, recently moved there. Score! It was so wonderful to catch up and fun to see some different neighborhoods and meet her wonderful hubby to be.

Definitely one of those, if you had told me ten years ago that we would be here I never would have guessed it, moments.

Our last day in town, Adam had to work and it was pouring rain, so Hazel and I headed to the Melbourne Museum. We caught a great exhibit called Designing 007: Fifty Years of Bond Style.

I simply made a deal with my little munchkin that if she was good while I was in the adult exhibit that I would be good while she was in the kids area. It worked. This time.

After those two trips, we were happy to be back in Auckland for the holidays and get in some R & R before our next set of visitors. We did manage to squeeze in one day trip up to a friend's bach in Martins Bay.

So fun to be on their boat out on the water and eat scallops fresh from the sea. We docked at the Kawau Island Historic Reserve, for an ice cream, but I'd love to go back another time and see the Mansion House and explore some more trails.

The holidays are a hard time to be away from home, but the salt, sand, and sun help. And of course seeing Hazel experience so many firsts.

May this kind of Christmas joy be with you throughout the new year.